bouncing back

today was one long struggle... to stay awake, to get anything done, to even figure out what to get done. every time i take a red-eye, i remember why they call it that - whether you get any sleep or not, you return with a feeling of bleary-eyed fogginess.

a few things helped me get through the day - a loooong walk by the water with my pooch, a phone call from my best friend to catch up (on the week), and a phone call from a perpetual "phone-tag"ing friend to catch up (on the year).


i started thinking about why these things combined to not only get me through the day but make me feel better so quickly and bring me back to myself.

• the first helped me breathe, be more alert, get into the moment, and stretch my eyes (and my legs)

• the second helped me review an amazing week - the big moments, the small wonders, the blessings galore - as well as get out of my self-absorbed state to hear her stories and reconnect in a way that you can only do with someone who knows you like a sister

• the third helped me put things in perspective.... when you connect with someone you haven't seen in awhile you tend to talk bigger-picture. it can be a good way to assess where you've come, where you're going, and not only chart your progress but organize your thoughts and feelings around it. and telling these things to someone who you know is in your corner can also help you feel supported, and be an impetus to propel you forward.

the next time i feel sluggish, stuck, or out of sorts, i plan to try to simulate today's remedy for my red-eye-induced fogginess and see if this formula will work for me again: get up and move, assess the source of the emotions, and then pull back to get the broader view and put things in perspective.

and i'll make sure i have a couple friends and my cute dog around for support :-)

the dash

last night I attended a fundraiser for the Cardinal Stepinac Children's Center, in Port au Prince Haiti. about 140 people came together with the goal of raising money to build a school for the 50 orphaned/abandoned children who live there.

the guest of honor at the event was Miss America 2011, Teresa Scanlon. during her speech she talked about how volunteering in Haiti has changed her life (boy, can i relate). she reminded us that no matter how young or old we may be, we can all start from today and live our lives with purpose, focusing on the things which are most important to us and making a difference in the way that we feel called to do so.... she read a poem which really brought that message to life - i had never heard it before but i will definitely add it to my collection:

The Dash © 1996 Linda Ellis

I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone from the beginning to the end.

He noted that first came the date of her birth and spoke of the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time that she spent alive on earth
And now only those who loved her know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own, the cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.

So think about this long and hard; are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough to consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand the way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger and show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile,
Remembering that this special dash might only last a little while.

So when your eulogy is being read with your life’s actions to rehash
Would you be proud of the things they say about how you spent your dash?

busyness

anyone who knows me knows that i tend to be pretty busy. somewhere around my high school years i realized that i am good at multitasking and that i am happy when i have a variety of different things going on. only when i feel myself getting anxious, or when i cant get enough sleep, do i take that as a sign to dial it back, because in general i feel happier when i have a lot to do than when i don't. i suppose its because being busy makes me feel productive.

lately, though, i have been allowing myself the luxury of relaxing a bit more often - its part of my effort to be more attuned to the universe. one way i do this is conscious "wandering" on the internet -- letting click lead to click until i have no idea how i even got to where i ended up (a virtual version of flipping through a magazine or killing time at a flea market). its liberating to just see where i land what i can discover. i've found some pretty interesting people/websites/thoughts that way... or they've found me. one such post was from a pastor in LA named toure roberts. i discovered him in december when i really needed to hear some of the things he had to say. then recently i found (thru twitter) that pastor roberts has a blog. how i missed this before is a mystery, but then his blog found me just as i was thinking about my lack of focus. here is an exerpt:

"We can get so lost in busyness that we actually forget what really matters to us most in life and lose sight of the true reason for us even working. Busyness begins to take on a life of it’s own and the next thing we know we’re living the life of busyness as opposed to the life that’s according to our purpose. It’s important to remember that our purpose is not to serve busyness, but rather our busyness is to serve our purpose. This requires daily minute-by-minute moment-by-moment focus on our purpose to make certain that all of our activities and all of our comings and goings are moving us closer toward our purpose instead of furthering us away from it."

http://toureroberts.tumblr.com/post/16007714459/the-two-most-important-questions-you-can-ever-ask

it is true that we can take activity as productiveness... but not all motion leads us forward. a friend of mine calls this "twirling" - moving from place-to-place only to find we are being led in circles and not progressing.

at those times it's important to stop and check ourselves. asking questions like these, and like the 10 questions i posted previously, can help make sure we are acting with purpose.